“Not “Judging” has become a password for “leave me alone I can do what I want and you should still think the same of me’.
Real Ahavas Yisroel has nothing to do with not “Judging”, “
Not quite so. Al tadun es chaveircha ad shetagiyah limkomo. The concept of not judging does not mean leave them alone. It means don’t be holier than thou and ASSUME that what you believe and follow is THE only correct path. Many frum Jews who are scrupulous in their adherence to the Torah, do not feel that their observance has to parallel yours. You want to wear only white shirts – fine. But do not negatively judge someone who wears clean and pressed BLUE shabbos shirts, or striped ones, or any other type, as long as he is clean, neat, and presentable l’kovod Shabbos. That is just ONE example.