Wow, BP Mentch, you must have posted a doozy to have earned an EDITED.
# 1, I do not blame victims. And I’m also opposed to the use of the phrase “she asked for it”.
# 2, Its a free country (though not a hefker velt) and the OP (and anyone else in the CR) can dress any way they please.
But choices come with side effects, and the way you present yourself (both good or bad) has a direct impact on how others treat you. Fair or not, its fact.
Plus, as I stated earlier, the “chatting up” may have been Ms. OP’s dramatic imagination, thinking that all the men are out to get her. I’m not sure of your workplace experience, but I can assure you, mine is extensive and non-frum.
In the workplace, trouble knocks on the doors that have someone home. If the chatting up was truely out of bounds, it might warrant a self assesment.