CherryBim:
MyTake made an excellent point, and I commend her for trying to reach out to those who are trying to be mattir issurim, and you chose to ruin its effect with an inane remark.
No, you would not be “shocked beyond words” to see your Rav playing golf in anywhere close to the same degree as you would be if she saw a rebbetzin engaged in this nivalah.
More precisely, you would not be “shocked beyond words at how terrible it is” for your Rav to play golf. But she would be if she saw a Rebbetzin engage in this nivalah.
The koach of the yetzer hara is truly awesome. She is telling you that she has the sensitivity to appreciate that it’s wrong, and she understands it is hard to stop, but you make light of the whole thing and deny it outright so that people should go on thinking it’s perfectly okay to engage in this nivalah.
It is wrong. It is inappropriate. It is assur.